Today marked the day that Lilly Pulitzer designs came to target. But they didn’t come to stay, they come for a few fleeting moments and were gone.
I was one of those poor schmucks who waited months for this event and alas came out of it empty handed. Of course I went right to Target’s Facebook page and left them a comment letting them know my deep disappointment…I am sure the CEO of Target was greatly moved by my feelings.
Here is Eric and me in the only real Lilly dress I will ever own,
a gift from my mama for my rehearsal dinner
But this whole thing got me thinking about living in this world of consumerism as a follower of Christ. By the world’s standards, we never can have enough. There is always something we are missing, something that we absolutely need to be complete. Perhaps it’s a cheaply made, Target brand Lilly Pulitzer dress, or a nice car, or a perfectly Pinterest house. But it will never be enough.
I love clothes. I love putting outfits together and getting compliments when I end up looking decent. I love searching for things and finally finding them in an obscure online boutique.
Part of my love of clothes is fueled by my need to be perfect, look perfect, be enviable to other women. Oh how I hate to admit that! But it’s true…
And so I wrestle with the idea of being consumed by consumerism. I say things like, “I really NEED a new pair of sneakers,” or “Eric, we NEED those sham pillows for the shams on our bed,” or “I NEED a new dress because the other 100 in my closet won’t work for this wedding we’re going to.”
I throw “need” around like I don’t even know the meaning of the word. So, I thought, maybe I really don’t. Thus, I consulted my friend Webster on his thoughts regarding “need”. Some of the definitions fit right into my selfish idea of need, but this one stood out to me:
need- a physiological or psychological requirement for the well-being of an organism
Uhoh for me…I actually do not NEED most of the things that I claim I do.
CRAP.
Okay so I had to take a few steps back here. Because technically I already knew this, I just pretended I didn’t so I could go on living in my consumerist bubble.
The question becomes this: Is it wrong to have things? Want things? Buy things we don’t necessarily need?
Hebrews 13:5 says this: “
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
1 Timothy 6:9-10 “
But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.”
Matthew 16:19-21 “
Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
This next one was hard for me to swallow…
Luke 12:33-34 “
Sell your possessions, and give to the needy. Provide yourselves with moneybags that do not grow old, with a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, where no thief approaches and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”
1 John 2:15-27 “
Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”
And my favorite:
Phillippians 4:12 “
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.”
I don’t know about you, but I am getting the same message every which way I look in the Bible. Consumerism is consuming. You cannot serve both God and money/things.
Does your consumerism consume you? Does it take you to a place where God is not needed? Do you worship things above your Savior? Let’s be honest here, because we all have at some point. But that is where the danger of consumerism lies.
Lord Jesus help us to be consumed only by YOU. Give us the strength to live in a world where idols are everywhere. You are enough God, help us to feel that in every ounce of our being. You alone our worthy God. Thank you for the many things you have given us, let it not cloud our love for you or our willingness to live out your will for us here on earth. Amen.
No Longer “Enns”.
/in UncategorizedToday is Day 1 of my first writer’s workshop.
I’m sitting in a tiny little garden next to the chapel at Princeton Seminary staring down at my name tag and wishing it said something else.
My dad isn’t famous by any means (he will tell you so himself), but he’s written a bunch of books and travels and speaks and a lot of people love him and a lot of people hate him, which means something.
I am so proud of him. So proud to call him father. Proud when people ask me if I am his daughter. Proud to have a close connection with someone whose writing inspires the lives of others.
But now here I am, at a place where many would know his name, and I am a Petters.
I contemplated asking for my name tag to say Elizabeth Enns, anything to start up a conversation in a place where I know nobody.
I am struck by how desperately I feel I need this safety net.
This is a big moment for me.
Who are you Lizz?
Who are you as a writer, with nothing to stand on but your passion for words and a desire to write?
No hiding behind someone else. Just me.
It never ceases to amaze me the ways that little life things challenge us.
My name changing wasn’t some intensely God-ordained event so that I could come to this conference and find myself as a writer outside of my dad. It was the natural progression of life: I get married, name change. But isn’t it awesome how He’s using it anyway, as minor as it is, to guide me on this journey?
Here we go Elizabeth Petters. It’s all you.
How To Wrangle Your Preschool Class With No Voice.
/in UncategorizedAs promised, here is my account of what teaching a class of 9 preschoolers is like with no voice.
First things first, we need to lay a little groundwork. Preschoolers are curious and creative and energetic and loving, they love to learn anything and everything new. They like to push limits and test boundaries and wait until you get to 3 before they follow directions. They test my patience and expand my patience in ways I never imagined they could and they have taught me how to love fiercely and intentionally.
Before I went to work yesterday I sat down on my couch and prayed that God would teach me something, anything in all of this. It seemed like a good learning experience. How exactly do you wrangle your class of preschoolers with no voice? HOW?
Yesterday morning started off well. My sweet little students made me “chicken noodle soup” and “popsicles” out of play dough and the rice in our sensory table. They asked me over and over again why my voice was broken and gave me so many hugs I could barely stand their cuteness. “This isn’t so bad”, I thought, “My little angles.”
Fast forward half an hour to recess…
WALKING THROUGH A PARKING LOT WITH 9 THREE YEAR OLDS AND NO VOICE IS A HORRIBLE EXPERIENCE.
You can’t yell STOP or FREEZE or STAY ON THE SIDEWALK or SLOW DOWN. All you can do is try to herd your little stampede across the street and into the welcomed gates of the playground without anyone straying.
30 minutes later, we did It all over again. Me holding the hands of as many children as I could while some of the oldest ones held hands with each other right in front of me.
Back in the classroom my little munchkins had nowhere to run, so I calmed down just a little bit. I forwent the normal days activities and allowed the kids to have center play most of the morning in an effort to save my voice.
In that lull of the day where there was no transitioning and minimal chaos, I found that I almost liked the absence of my voice. Every time I wanted to communicate I had to be so close to my kiddoes that I couldn’t help but notice all the tiny little details that make them unique; the colors of their eyes and their knotty preschool hair, their small but able hands, and their baby soft skin.
I welcomed quietly giving them instructions while kneeling in front of them, and listening to them “read” to me because they knew that I couldn’t read to them. I revisited all of the reasons I love each and every one of my students and tasted, ever so slightly, Christ’s incredible love for each of them as well.
Yesterday was utter chaos, don’t get me wrong. In many ways it confirmed, for me, a child’s need for structure, and direction. They need to know who is in charge and they need to know that it’s not them. But, in so many ways, I was also given a gift yesterday; The gift of stepping out of structure, and seeing my kiddoes in a different light.
While I hope to high heaven that I never lose my voice again on a school day, I also pray that God continues to give me experiences to help me grow more in my ability to love these children like He does and to point them towards Him in everything I do.
“Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
Matthew 19:14
I’ll Love You Forever.
/in UncategorizedYou are correct if you assumed this post is somehow related to mother’s day. Because, well, everyone is talking about it…so of course, I had to too.
I don’t really know how I feel about “mother’s day”, but I know how I feel about mothers, and I know exactly how I feel about my mother in particular.
Basically, what’s not to love? She’s selfless, and gentle, and generous, and kind. And my favorite thing about her is that I can slide her name right into 1 Corinthians 13.
My mama is patient,
she is kind. she does not envy, she does not boast, she is not proud.
She does not dishonor others, she is not self-seeking,
she is not easily angered,
she keeps no record of wrongs.
My mama d
oes not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth.
She
always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
My mama managed to raise me straight through hell and still loves me with her whole heart and for that and many more reasons I am forever in awe of this woman.
I always knew there was something very special about this woman, even though she wouldn’t let me eat ice cream whenever I wanted, or watch TV on weekdays. She would tell us to go play in the yard every chance we could and never said a word when we dug up her garden to make “stew” for our kitchen.
One summer she let us drag the hose into the basement, wet the entire floor, and pretend we were ice skaters wearing our roller blades. She may not have known about it at first, but she never did seem mad about it, and she even appeared to watch the final performance.
My mom homeschooled us all for first grade so that she could teach us how to read herself. She took us on so many field trips that I can’t even imagine how those years counted educationally, but they did, and I’ve never learned more. We even made applesauce in the kitchen the old fashioned way, wearing pilgrims costumes.
My mom was the first person to ever tell me that I was a writer, and she always encouraged me to submit my stories to contests when I was little. When my bratty little self decided I couldn’t stand to be homeschooled for some reason, she put me in public school, and didn’t say a word when I came home crying every night because the kids were so mean. Or even when I refused to back.
When I got older she made me tea when I left school and walked home without telling anyone, because she knew exactly what I needed. She never assumed that I was a “messed up kid”, even when that’s all anyone else could see.
When it came time for her to let me go, 3 years before she had expected to send me away from home, she did so with the love, compassion, and the grace of Jesus Christ.
For me, mother’s day is a ridiculous holiday. It’s an excuse to honor our mothers just one day a year. Without this woman that I call mom, not only would I have never been born, but I wouldn’t still be living right now. She has been my hope and strength in so many instances when I have had neither.
I only hope that I can nurture another life the way she has nurtured mine.
“I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I’m living, my mama you’ll be”
Consumer, Not Consumed.
/in UncategorizedToday marked the day that Lilly Pulitzer designs came to target. But they didn’t come to stay, they come for a few fleeting moments and were gone.
I was one of those poor schmucks who waited months for this event and alas came out of it empty handed. Of course I went right to Target’s Facebook page and left them a comment letting them know my deep disappointment…I am sure the CEO of Target was greatly moved by my feelings.
Here is Eric and me in the only real Lilly dress I will ever own,
a gift from my mama for my rehearsal dinner
But this whole thing got me thinking about living in this world of consumerism as a follower of Christ. By the world’s standards, we never can have enough. There is always something we are missing, something that we absolutely need to be complete. Perhaps it’s a cheaply made, Target brand Lilly Pulitzer dress, or a nice car, or a perfectly Pinterest house. But it will never be enough.
I love clothes. I love putting outfits together and getting compliments when I end up looking decent. I love searching for things and finally finding them in an obscure online boutique.
Part of my love of clothes is fueled by my need to be perfect, look perfect, be enviable to other women. Oh how I hate to admit that! But it’s true…
And so I wrestle with the idea of being consumed by consumerism. I say things like, “I really NEED a new pair of sneakers,” or “Eric, we NEED those sham pillows for the shams on our bed,” or “I NEED a new dress because the other 100 in my closet won’t work for this wedding we’re going to.”
I throw “need” around like I don’t even know the meaning of the word. So, I thought, maybe I really don’t. Thus, I consulted my friend Webster on his thoughts regarding “need”. Some of the definitions fit right into my selfish idea of need, but this one stood out to me:
need- a physiological or psychological requirement for the well-being of an organism
Uhoh for me…I actually do not NEED most of the things that I claim I do.
CRAP.
Okay so I had to take a few steps back here. Because technically I already knew this, I just pretended I didn’t so I could go on living in my consumerist bubble.
The question becomes this: Is it wrong to have things? Want things? Buy things we don’t necessarily need?
Hebrews 13:5 says this: “
Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”
1 Timothy 6:9-10 “
But those who desire to be rich fall into temptation, into a snare, into many senseless and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs.”
Matthew 16:19-21 “
Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
This next one was hard for me to swallow…
Luke 12:33-34 “
Sell your possessions, and give to the needy. Provide yourselves with moneybags that do not grow old, with a treasure in the heavens that does not fail, where no thief approaches and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”
1 John 2:15-27 “
Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world. And the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever.”
And my favorite:
Phillippians 4:12 “
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.”
I don’t know about you, but I am getting the same message every which way I look in the Bible. Consumerism is consuming. You cannot serve both God and money/things.
Does your consumerism consume you? Does it take you to a place where God is not needed? Do you worship things above your Savior? Let’s be honest here, because we all have at some point. But that is where the danger of consumerism lies.
Lord Jesus help us to be consumed only by YOU. Give us the strength to live in a world where idols are everywhere. You are enough God, help us to feel that in every ounce of our being. You alone our worthy God. Thank you for the many things you have given us, let it not cloud our love for you or our willingness to live out your will for us here on earth. Amen.
The Lost One.
/in UncategorizedA few weeks ago my pastor asked me to write a devotional on the parable of the prodigal son (or lost son). To be honest it’s been years since I really sat down and read this parable, but I’ve always identified with it so deeply. Not just because of its implications about Christ welcoming us with open arms, but because, sadly, I can identify with the son in his actions.
I think that people often mistake this parable as portraying the father’s love and forgiveness after his son comes back in repentance and regret, but I just don’t see it that way. Nowhere in the parable does it say anything about the son’s repentance. He comes to his father out of complete desperation and lack of all other options. It paints so beautiful a picture for me of Christ’s love. I so often have come to His feet out of desperation, not repentance, and He welcomes me with open arms and compassion.
And so on this quiet Saturday morning, let’s take a few minutes to look a little closer at this parable, shall we?
But while he was still far off, the father saw him and was filled with compassion (Luke 15:20)
As we enter the parable in Luke 15: 11, we see that a man had two sons and divided his property equally between them. The younger son took all that his father had given him, moved far away, and “squandered his wealth in wild living” (Luke 15:13 NIV). If you’ve ever had teenagers you might be able to identify with the father at this point. Basically, the son takes the money his father has given him and does whatever he wants. Likely making some very destructive choices.
Once the son had spent all he had, he found himself broke and lonely. He got a job feeding pigs, envying the slop they were eating because he was so hungry. He’s really hit rock bottom at this point. So he decided it was time to go home. He rehearsed a speech to give to his father when he returned, hoping that his dad would at least give him something to eat. The bible then tells us
that
“
while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him” (Luke 15:19). Oh what a scene this must have been! Here comes the son, trudging along, not so much repentant as he is desperate. From a distance his father sees him coming, and without even a thought, he runs to meet him, hugs him, and welcomes him home like he was never gone!
This is the love we have in our heavenly father. While we are still far off doing our own thing, living our lives our way, at times unrepentant, He is ready to welcome us back with open arms, ready to forgive us no matter what we’ve done. In an article by biblical scholar and my dad, Peter Enns, he writes: “The story isn’t about conversion to Christianity. It’s about God being on the look out for those in the family who have wandered off, and God simply can’t wait to welcome them home.”
What if God’s love really is greater than anything that we could ever do? What if He really truly loves us despite all of the baggage that we as humans carry? How would that change the way we see our heavenly father? The way we see ourselves?
Our God is a God of unconditional love and grace. One who welcomes us with open arms no matter how far we’ve strayed from Him. He is greater than all of our sins and His love can reach us no matter how far we have wandered.
Reflection Questions
What is an area of your life where you have trouble believing God’s unconditional love for you? A past mistake? A current addiction?
In what ways has God shown you that He loves you and will always welcome you back with open arms?
When you feel as though you are far from Christ’s reach, what is something that could help remind you that nothing you can do can separate you from His love?
Winter Blues.
/in UncategorizedWinter is over…Almost.
As winter comes to a close and spring peaks it’s sunshiny head around the corner, I can’t help but wonder why I put so much weight on my hatred for winter. I mean I know why…It’s cold, and depressing, and long. But can a season really hold so much power over my attitude?
I look at pictures like this one and all I can think about is how much I love sun and summer and warmth. How could I not?!
Even Max loves summer!
Anyway enough about me. I though it was appropriate as we are nearing the end of winter, for us to stop and really take a look at the beauty in this season. And instead of writing this myself, I found someone who could do it much better than I could. You can find the devotional here:
http://www.crosswalk.com/blogs/daniel-
darling/finding-joy-in-winter.html
There is so much beauty in winter, just as there is also beauty in life’s suffering. But never fear dear friends, summer is just around the corner!
Revelation7:13-17
“The
n one of the elders asked me, “These in white robes–who are they, and where did they come from?”
I answered, “Sir, you know.” And he said, “These are they who have come out of the great tribulation; they have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb.
Therefore, “they are before the throne of God and serve him day and night in his temple; and he who sits on the throne will spread his tent over them.
Never again will they hunger; never again will they thirst. The sun will not beat upon them, nor any scorching heat.
For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.”
Intentional Breaks.
/in UncategorizedUsually words flow from me with such ease. I ache to let them out. Sometimes I can barely get to my computer fast enough to type out what I’m thinking.
Not recently.
If there’s one thing that I know about myself it’s that I have the ability to take something I love and turn it into an obligation very easily. As soon as I feel that happening I know that I need to just take a step back and let it come back to me. This has been an important part of my running journey as well. As soon as it stops being enjoyable to me for whatever reason, I just need to take a break.
Am I okay with not always “loving” the things that I love? I am. Because I have learned over the years that even the things you love can become things you despise when you make it an obligation. It’s that part of me that takes things way to far. That part of me that decided to eat less in high school and was suddenly eating nothing. That part of me that starts running and can’t bring myself to stop. That part of me that takes out the hammer when I just don’t feel “good enough”.
So nowadays I check myself when I start to take things to far. Writing is my release, my peace, my passion. But when it’s not, that is okay too. I want to allow myself the flexibility to be what I need to be in each moment.
So, I will be back! Maybe tomorrow, maybe not. But the creative juices will flow once more!
Thanks for all the love and support friends!
P.S. this is where I would love to be right now!
God Gets It.
/in UncategorizedI struggle with the idea of suffering. I struggle with watching others suffer. I struggle with the truth that God is in it and all around it and in control. I struggle with the reality that life can be beautiful and painful and just as it should be all at once.
I have a tendency to want to fix things. I see pain around me and I want to do everything I can to take that from others so that they wont suffer. I think I get that from my dad. I remember that when I was a little girl I used to have vividly horrific dreams. I would wake up screaming and my dad would come running in, sit by my bedside and put both his hands over my forehead. He would wince dramatically like it was taking all his energy to remove my bad dreams and then he would put them in his own forehead. After he left I would sleep soundly, certain that my daddy was holding all my bad dreams now and that he would never let them come after me again.
Now here I am, a 24 year old woman, desperately wanting to take all the bad things from others and not being able to. I have had to come to terms with the fact that I cannot save anyone. I have no power to do so and no right to.
God and I have had some intense conversations recently. I watch my sweet Joanna suffer deeply and I challenge His good and perfect plan. It makes no sense to me. I guess those are the key words: to me. It is beyond my capacity to understand how my God could allow so much to come upon anyone.
When I watch her day in and day out, pushing through trial after trial, trusting in our Savior through scans, and appointments, and so much medication, and fatigue beyond what I can imagine, I challenge Him. I can picture how he sees me: sweatpants, messy bun, standing in my living room screaming up at Him to make it better. I can only assume that He smiles at my childishness, brushes my hair out of my eyes, sits down beside me. “You must trust me”, He would say, “My plan for Joanna’s life is bigger than you can imagine. Be still my sweet one, for I am holding her every so tightly.”
As I write this I am crying over my computer keys. My God is in control. If that is how He tenderly speaks to me about my friend I cannot even imagine how He is with her. How He wipes away her tears, and carries her through all her appointments, and rocks her to sleep at night, and soothes the hearts of the family she so strongly cares for.
I know that He expects our resistance. He understands our feelings. He was human after all. It gives me great peace to know that this God we serve “gets it” and walks with us through all of our kicking and screaming, our angry words, our messy tears, our “I give up” moments. Oh he most definitely “gets it”.
And so we may never understand His plan, or the paths that take us there. But we can trust in His goodness because at times that is all we have.
Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. -Philippians 4:7-
Broken Together.
/in UncategorizedDay 20.
Today’s blog post brought to you by Casting Crowns and their song Broken Together. It’s a beautiful song about what marriage is in the light of our humanness. I heard it for the first time today and as soon as the chorus hit it seeped straight into my soul. It’s one of those raw emotion songs.
The chorus was a beautiful reminder to me of the importance of vulnerable, honest, brokenness in relation with another person. To me, this song did not just speak of marriage, but of all relationships. No matter who you are or what stage of life you are in, there’s nothing like bringing forth our own brokenness that binds us so closely with others.
I know we’re not the fairytale you dreamed we’d be
You wore the veil, you walked the aisle, you took my hand
And we dove into a mystery
How I wish we could go back to simpler times
Before all our scars and all our secrets were in the light
Now on this hallowed ground, we’ve drawn the battle lines
Will we make it through the night
It’s going to take much more than promises this time
Only God can change our minds
Maybe you and I we’re never meant to be complete
Could we just be broken together
If you can bring your shattered dreams and I’ll bring mine
Could healing still be spoken and save us
The only way we’ll last forever is broken together
How it must have been so lonely by my side
We were building kingdoms and chasing dreams and left love behind
I’m praying God will help our broken hearts align
And we won’t give up the fight
Running With Purpose.
/in UncategorizedI love to run…usually.
There’s something about running that feels so freeing. I am so connected to my mind and my body. My feet hit the pavement in a hypnotic rhythm and I relish the moment when I push off the ground propelling myself further. You see, I love to be in control, and this fulfills that for me.
I am currently training for a few half marathons I am doing this year and as much as I love working towards something, I feel less in control when I “have” to run a certain mileage each day. I can’t just go run for however long I want to, I have to follow the training schedule I have set up.
Yesterday I was running on the treadmill (thanks winter), and I started to get really bored. The aerobics class that I had been watching for the first 4 miles had ended and so now I was looking at an empty room in front of me. It crossed my mind a few times to just stop and do something else or find Eric and go home and eat some leftover ice cream cake (I ended up doing that later anyway).
I have a strategy for these moments. I once read in one of my running books that when you run or workout in any way, you should wear something small on your person that encourages you to keep going when you don’t want to. What inspires me when I’m running you ask?
Here it is: HOPE
This bracelet is from my friend Joanna, who is
battling
beating cancer right now. She’s a runner like me, craves it, loves it. But she’s not running right now. But I can. And so I will run for us both. Not because I feel sorry for her, but because she inspires me not to take anything for granted. She encourages me every moment of every day to treat life as a gift, no matter what it brings us.
And so I run for her and I run for me and let me tell you, when you are running for someone you love, you could run 100 or more miles and never give up.