It’s Okay To Be Afraid.

I took Max to the vet yesterday. Poor guy was TERRIFIED. His whole body was literally shaking the entire time.

For those of you who don’t know Max, he’s the Thor of dogs; tough, muscular, incredibly handsome. He has it all. Usually he is the one protecting me. Yet there we were, sitting in the vet’s office and he is climbing up onto the chair and trying to get into my lap.

It was obvious that he was afraid. And so I kept talking to him in this obnoxious baby voice that he loves so much and I kept telling him “it’s okay buddy. you’re okay buddy”. But then I stopped and thought about it for a second. Every 6 months, we bring Max to this place and they give him a million shots, take a poop sample or two, and poke him all over. No wonder he is shaking like a leaf. He knows what’s going on. So then I took a different route with my obnoxious baby voice and said, “okay Max, this totally sucks, but it’s only for a little and then we’ll go home and we can snuggle on the couch, ok”

Not that I believe that my dog understands what I am saying at all. But it made a difference for me. Because I realized that I don’t much care for the way that I approach fear in general. My initial reaction is to tell myself or others that it’s going to be okay, but the reality is that usually we are afraid for a reason.

And it’s okay to be afraid.

Being the self proclaimed queen of anxiety, I basically have a PH.D in irrational fears. Put me in a crate with thousands of tiny spiders and I’ll be fine, but bring me to any public place and I’ll likely have a panic attack in the first five minutes we’re there.

But regardless of whether someone tells us our fears are rational or irrational, there is still a reason for them, and we owe it to ourselves to respect our fear.

Yes, sometimes fear gets out of control and we need therapy, or a hot bath, or some good strong meds (or a combination of all three). But all the while it is important to respect our fear, to listen to what it is trying to tell us, to thank it for warning us of something no matter how small that something may seem.

So whatever it is that you’re afraid of today, be kind to yourself. Because at the end of the day, life can be really scary sometimes, and other people can be scary, and our own minds can be scary. Acknowledge that. Give yourself a break. Rest in the truth that we don’t walk through fear alone, and give yourself a great big emotional hug. You’d be surprised how much listening to your fear and respecting its purpose changes the way you see yourself and the world around you.